Diplomatic Incident
by MissAnnThropic
Summary: Jack is called in to salvage a diplomatic goof.


Title: Diplomatic Incident  
Author: MissAnnThropic  
Spoilers: Season 9  
Summary: Jack is called in to salvage a diplomatic goof.  
Disclaimer: I own nothing to do with Stargate but my rabid fan behavior. Alas.

* * *

The elevator doors to level 26 of the SGC slid open and Major General Jack O'Neill strode through, an impressive sight in his full dress blues. He fiddled with the last button of his coat as he walked hurriedly down the hall and finally caught sight of the reason he'd high-tailed it back to Colorado.

General Landry was sitting on a folding chair in the hallway. The heavy-set man was decked in his dress slacks and a collared shirt but his jacket had been piled to the floor and his tie loosened. Landry was wiping sweat from his brow and even from ten feet away Jack could see the wet sweat spots on the man's shirt. He looked every bit as nervous as he'd sounded on the phone.

"Hank," Jack said curtly as he neared him. The fidgety man leapt as quickly as he could to his feet. "Jack! Thank god you're here."

"What happened?" Jack asked grumpily. It wasn't that he disliked getting to come back to the SGC, but made to do so in such an undignified rush tended to stick in his craw. He was a general, damnit, he should be past the point in his career when he 'scurried' for anyone.

"Oh, Jack... I've made a real mess of things," Landry bemoaned as he fished his jacket off the floor, snagged hold of Jack's elbow, and began to escort him quickly down the corridor.

"Yeah, I've gathered that much; what the hell did you do that you had to call me?"

"I've futzed up a diplomatic issue."

Jack balked. "You have _so_ called the wrong person, I suck at diplomacy."

"You have to help me out here, Jack."

"Daniel's still around, right? Why not ask him? You'd be a lot better off getting diplomacy advice from him than–"

"It's the Asgard," Landry interrupted.

Jack resumed walking, but at a slower pace. "Oh... well, I don't see how you could have fouled up too badly; I was always an oaf in a council chamber but they liked me all right."

"That's why I need you to help me fix this."

Jack pulled Landry to a stop. "Just tell me what it is you did."

Landry shifted anxiously on his feet then said. "All right... we were contacted via one of those hologram things that the Asgard wanted to come talk to us about offering us some more technology in gratitude for what we did destroying the threat of the Replicators."

"Sounds good to me... go on."

Landry winced. "Well, I spiffed up my medals, shined my shoes, I was ready to go all out to meet these guys. Earth's best alien ally, right? Want to make a good impression."

Jack nodded.

"So... I'm dressed the nines, ready to do my damnedest to impress the pants off them–"

"They don't wear pants," Jack interjected.

"Not the point!" Landry clipped, then took a breath and continued. "In all your reports the Asgard representative that deals with the Tau'ri has always been Commander Thor."

Again, Jack nodded.

"So this little gray guy beams down into the middle of the conference room and I give him my best smile, step up to him, and say 'Hello, Commander Thor, I'm General Landry'." Landry huffed out a sigh.

Jack frowned. "That's it?"

Landry nodded.

Jack rubbed the bridge of his nose the way Daniel did when dealing with dim-witted colonels. "How is that a diplomatic incident?"

"It wasn't Thor!" Landry yelped.

"Another Asgard?" Jack guessed.

Landry nodded. "But I had no idea... I just assumed it would be Thor, and I've seen some pictures of the commander of the Asgard fleet, but..." Landry dropped his voice and stepped in toward Jack to whisper, "they all look alike to me."

Jack was processing the information while Landry groaned into his hands. "Anyway, I think I insulted him or something, because he got this really unpleasant look on his face and beamed out before I could say anything to try and make amends and..."

"All right, calm down... let's contact the Asgard and see if we can clear this up. Do you have that crystal walkie-talkie?"

Landry nodded. "It's still in the conference room."

The two men strode into the empty conference room and Jack picked up the Asgard communication device and activated it. In a matter of seconds there was a flash of light and an Asgard was standing in front of them.

Landry grimaced and opened his mouth to profusely apologize but Jack beat him to the punch. "Thor! Buddy, how you been?"

"Greetings, O'Neill," Thor said with a cant of his head.

Jack put down the crystal and propped himself casually on the edge of the table near the little gray alien. "So, I hear there was a little mix-up earlier."

Thor blinked. "Indeed."

Landry stepped forward. "Commander Thor, I cannot tell you how sorry I am for insulting your friend. I didn't mean to offend anyone."

Thor looked toward Landry, stared blankly at him, then looked back toward Jack. "It is, in fact I who should be making apologies."

"Ahh, don't sweat it, Thor... what'd you do?" Jack replied.

Thor glanced at Landry. "The Asgard recently decided to establish a new diplomatic council and appointed an Asgard by the name of Triton as its primary liaison to Earth. When he agreed to meet with the commander of the SGC he thought he would be meeting you," Thor looked pointedly at Jack.

"Yeah... meant to tell you about the transfer, but you know those long-distances charges are a real kicker."

Thor cant his head. "In any case, Triton only realized his error when General Landry introduced himself. He was quite embarrassed and returned to the ship in shame."

"Why was he embarrassed?" Jack asked.

"He thought Landry was you and did not realize his error until General Landry told Triton his name." Thor looked once more at Landry briefly then again toward Jack. "Often Asgard have some difficulty distinguishing one member of your species from another."

Jack was starting to smile. "We all look alike to you."

Thor nodded.

Jack chuckled and ticked his head toward Landry. "Well, secret's out that apparently some humans have trouble telling Asgard apart, too."

"So it would seem." Thor seemed to pause in thought. "I have noted, O'Neill, that you have always been capable of correctly identifying me."

Jack shrugged. "Well, you never got me confused with another human, either." Jack reached out and patted Thor on the shoulder. Thor nodded his head in a reciprocal gesture. "So... we got this meeting off on the wrong foot. Let's try again, huh?"

"I'm afraid Triton is quite ashamed to have mistaken Landry for you; you after whom we named one of the Asgard Fleet's finest, though short-lived, vessels."

Landry stepped up and said, "Thor, please tell Triton that I don't take any offense; hell, I made the same mistake myself! I've been chewing my nails down here thinking I'd ruined Earth/Asgard relations by mistaking him for you."

Thor looked askance at Landry then returned his attention to Jack.

"What do you say, no harm, no foul?" Jack offered.

Thor blinked, cocked his head, then said, "I believe both parties can agree to disregard the first unsuccessful attempt in the interest of diplomacy."

"Great," Jack said. "You get your guy down here and we'll talk business."

"You'll stay for the duration, Jack?" Landry asked hopefully.

Jack shrugged. "Why not? You brought me all the way down here, besides, I haven't had a chance to chat with my pal Thor here in a long time."

"It will indeed be most agreeable to exchange pleasantries with you, O'Neill.

"I will summon Triton immediately and we will 'get low on business'."

Jack smirked. "Get 'down to' business. And that sounds like a plan."­

END


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